I brag about my relationship. I do. Intentionally and unabashedly. In real life, of course, but also on the internet. I blog about it, I tweet about it, I post schmoopy photos with sickeningly-sweet captions. I do.
Let’s start this off by saying that I am a newlywed. In fact, I’m not just a newlywed, but a SUPER newlywed — I’ve been married a total of 2 whopping months today! Crazy, I know.
Bear with me here, though, because I don’t think this is just for married folk! I’ve always been this way with Christopher and my relationship, and here’s why.
It’s genuine. I am so stupidly in love and so lucky to have Christopher in my life and I want everyone to know it!
But do you want to know another reason? I truly, genuinely feel like there is a ton of negativity, especially involving relationships, on Facebook. I see people bashing their spouses or posting (absolutely zero percent) cryptic posts about their partner’s immaturity or lack of understanding or inability to do housework or Lord knows what else. And I hate it! I don’t understand why someone would want to trash talk their partner for their whole social circle to see!
So you’re frustrated or angry with your spouse? Call your mom! Call your best friend! Have a conversation about the issue with your partner! Why are you going to everyone you’ve ever known since high school and sharing your (and your partners’!) personal business? I don’t get it.
And the worst part? It works. It gets attention and responses and “support” from others. I’ve gotta tell you, it is so disheartening to read the replies on a negative post like that: “Yeah, men just don’t get it!” “Come on now, he should step it up!” “Why’s she being such a brat?” and goodness knows what else. Why is it a good idea to contribute to a negative situation in someone’s life? To me, this is public shaming of another person and it’s not cool.
(Now, just to be 100% clear here, I do not believe that you should fake internet happiness. If you’re unhappy or unsafe in your relationship you should absolutely seek help from friends or professional counselors. I would never ever want someone to act like they’re in a healthy situation when they are not. Just want to make sure I’m not unclear here.)
The point is, I want to uplift Christopher. I want everyone who knows me to know how much I love him, how wonderful he is, and that we are happy and doing well. Does this mean we never have conflict or never have struggles? Of course not! We’ve had many many trials that we’ve dealt with and will continue to deal with, but that is one of the reasons I adore us so much — we work through the tough things – privately – and come out better for it!
My job is to be supportive, and kind, and loving towards my partner. And so what if a fun way for me to do that is to post pictures of us wearing matching pajamas on a Tuesday night? Some people find that excessively cutesy stuff annoying, I know, but I love it! They can feel free to unfollow me if they want to, and that’s fine!
But if you’re my friend, I can assure you that I will “like” all of your super sweet photos with your partner! Keep spreading the love, ya’ll! It’s okay to be in a good relationship!!!